Written by Gabe Weigle

With COVID-19 numbers still higher than ever around the country, a lot of people are ready to ride this winter out on their couch.  Of course, this can also be dangerous since complete isolation can lead to a lot of serious mental health issues.  So, here are some tips to keep yourself energized through the winter months during a pandemic.

Ice water in your veins

You need to go for a winter walk!  Your weird neighbor who always wears shorts is out there, so why not you in proper winter attire?  You can even pretend you were jogging when you see your neighbor venturing out to pick up their recent amazon purchase.  This will improve your reputation in the neighborhood as “health-nut Seth” which everyone is into.  You could also get a fire pit going and invite some friends over for a social distance happy hour.  Don’t have money for a fire pit?  Go old school hobo and throw a bunch of stuff to burn in a steel drum.  It’s a pandemic, so Armageddon-type lawn pieces are always appreciated.  

You can’t use the cold as an excuse, so muster all of your strength and kick off that weighted blanket to venture out into the arctic for some real peace of mind!

Hit the Trails

Join a local outdoor organization or group! Going for a hike in a state park or local botanical garden could lift your spirits by experiencing something truly unique.  You might say, “Hey Gabe, going on a hike in the winter is depressing; everything is so dead and barren, it makes me even more depressed”  I would say Damn! I thought emo died in the early 2000’s. My Chemical Romance?! Cheer up sunshine.  You are looking at a fresh palate and a new year with nothing written in stone! You are seeing what could be the birth of something truly amazing in you or something around you.  You are walking through hope!  So, wipe off that black eye make-up, grab a cliff bar, and enjoy nature!

Pod up

Get yo self a pod and socialize, you little socializer, you! If you don’t know what podding is, it refers to selecting a few folks or a few families to hang with during global health disasters.  You all agree to certain protocols to keep yourselves safe from the virus and any possible exposure, then hang out in person.  This can be great in getting some actual human interaction we are all dying for, but be careful who you choose.  If you have an uncle whose fly is down 40% of the time, hard pass!  If he cannot remember that, then how is he going to remember putting on a mask?  That friend who likes to make out with people?  They friggin’ love it, and this pandemic is not stopping them!  That Dad who is a “toucher” (not in a perverted creepy way, but loves to shake hands, give pat on the back, hug a stranger, kiss you on the cheek when they’re drunk, etc.)?  This guy loves to get his paws on you, so be sure to keep him out of the pod.  Instead, you should have a Zoom intervention with him, and let him know he has to stop ruffling people’s hair in a playful manner for at least a year.  

Make your Zoom more interesting

With both work and school using video conferencing, it can be hard to feel motivated to reach out to loved ones on this platform.  It can make you miss them even more and make you realize your life now is just a series of images on a screen—or you can jazz up your calls with some FUN GAMES!!!  Play a murder mystery game with your friends!  Just make sure you let them know you are playing a murder mystery game first, and don’t have it be a surprise.  I had to spend two hours explaining to the cops that there was not an attempted homicide at my residence.  Thanks, Aunt Sara!  She witnesses one live murder and has to be the hero.  Anyway, just make sure everyone is on the same page.  Also try to play a game that doesn’t need an immediate response.  If someone is on a delay, it can make the game “Heads Up” ragingly difficult and can threaten a once healthy relationship between a brother and a sister.  We were 2 minutes in, and she was still asking, “Can you see me?!”  I just need some damn guidance, woman!!!  We hope to speak again sometime in the spring.

I work out…Virtually

A lot of people have turned to fitness apps and internet-based training to find a human connection, as well as keeping a healthy lifestyle.  A couple tips: no matter how many people you beat on your virtual 5k, it is never cool in the comments to say, “I really burned a lot of you tubbies out there!”  That is neither helpful nor will earn you any friends.  Please try to be mature when picking a workout handle for your workout website of choice.  Thrust 24/7 is not cute; it is childish and distracting in this arena, and any names in this vein should be avoided at all times. Although, hearing a virtual spin instructor yell, “Thrust 24/7, give it your all!” is delightful and will get you through lots of negative thoughts that may creep up during this dark period. Remember, a healthy lifestyle should be fun, so get out there and have a great time! It is all not that serious.

Help other humans! Especially the ones you do not like!

Since the world has lost its mind, it is now more important than ever to be nice to everyone.  Let’s say the grid goes down and we socially collapse.  You are going to need bread.  The grocery store has been taken by group of vigilantes called The Wegman’s Mussolinis, so you need to be on the good side of Mrs. Chesterbum down the street!  Sure, she yells at you to stop playing the guitar so loud even though you do not own an instrument, but she bakes a killer sourdough, which will sustain you for weeks at a time.  This will help you avoid joining the Walmart War Angels to get your meals.

Be nice to the people around you!

Be patient with your Mom who, in 11 months, still cannot figure out when she is on mute.  Sure, several of your Christmas presents won’t get to their destination until 2081.  Who cares?!  Remember time capsules?  They are a blast!  How psyched would you be if Prince’s Purple rain vinyl showed up at your house tomorrow?! Once everyone can hang out again, I guarantee you that within the first two days, you will be thinking “Alone time will be so nice!” Humans are designed to see the negative in everything, but we are also adaptive little buggers.  So when everything seems negative, we need to focus on the positive and stay there.  I don’t have to go to work and smell Terry’s Thursday tuna salad, we don’t have to watch Jena breakdown the group restaurant bill to the penny, sweat pants are amazing, and life is more comfortable than any time in history.  I know people are going through unbelievable hard times and many are silently suffering right now.  So it is important to be kind, be silly, and pants your family, friends, and acquaintances as much as possible!  Nothing brings people together than surprisingly pulling down their pants.  Be safe, wear a mask, and delightfully pull down your loved ones trousers!  This is 2021!  Have a little fun with it!